It's not the first week of December? Are you sure?

So, I got off pretty easy this December with things happening. I only felt dizzy one day and only had to write three referrals on my birthday. But, now everything else is falling apart. Here's the list. Let's break it down.
1. Tried to bake this weekend. Guessed it would take me an hour (and it took me 4). Ben was in a weird mood so he was at my house, but zoning out at the same time. At one point I left him because he was being weird to do something on the computer. I came back about half an hour later and talked to him while later that evening he asked me if I had gone anywhere while he had been sitting there. He didn't know how long he had been zoned out.
2. Okay, baking took a long time, which would have been fine, if almost everything I made had come out okay. However, the middle part of the caramel peacan bars didn't melt so I lost two whole rows of them. The fudge didn't set. The lemon bars didn't set, either. So, I spent all this time cutting and making stuff only to half to pitch/find a creative use for two of my recipies.
3. I attempted to make fudge again Monday night. Yeah, it didn't set either. I finally figured out why tonight. I'm an idiot and am unable to convert ounces to pounds. My question is, why don't we have a scale that measures ounces and pounds instead of just pounds?
4. So, it was cold and a little snowy on Monday morning. I was unaware that my windshield wipers were frozen to the windshield (since there was no ice on my windshield) and I tried to work them. They broke. I broke like the crank shaft between the motor and the wiper blades. I can hear the motor working, so I know it's fine, but the wipers won't move.
5. Okay, this wouldn't be a big deal. My dad was going to take it to the shop for me this morning to get it fixed. However, when I got home, my car was still sitting there. Turns out the alarm fucked up and he couldn't get it started. I tried to start it and it acted like the alarm was set (when it wasn't) and it didn't start. I then used the manual override and the battery would turn on, but the car wouldn't start. Now we're waiting (and have been waiting for an hour and a half) for AAA to get here to tow it to a garage where they can fix it. Now I have to go with my mom to the car fixy place and tell them to yank the fucking alarm out of my car because it has been nothing but trouble. I want a new car. I want a relaxing evening. I want to go to sleep before 9:00 one day this week.

Thank goodness there is only one more day left of the week. Let's hope my kids don't go crazier. Wait, they've already gone insane and I can't wait to see what new shit they come up with next.